


Mistletoe Mayhem

by StormWildcat



Category: South Park
Genre: Christmas Party, F/M, Holiday Sweaters, I will go down with these ships, Kissing, M/M, Mistletoe, So many ships, Teenagers, Time Skips, creek - Freeform, style
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-12-14
Updated: 2017-12-14
Packaged: 2019-02-14 18:54:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,580
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13014021
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/StormWildcat/pseuds/StormWildcat
Summary: Bebe throws a holiday party during senior year with the whole gang. Of course she plants a troublesome little bunch of leaves in just the right place. Mistletoe mayhem ensues.





	Mistletoe Mayhem

**Author's Note:**

> I HAVE MANY A SP SHIP. HERE HAVE THEM WITH NEAT LITTLE BOWS AND RIBBONS ON THEM. XD

December is synonymous with a lot of other words in the quiet mountain town of South Park. Record-breaking snowfall, crowded shops at the mall, more tinsel and string lights than necessary and an intense grasp of the holiday spirit on the townsfolk. Everyone seemed to be in a lighter mood than the remainder of the year and many took advantage of this.

 

Given it was the last year of a certain group of student’s high school careers, Bebe took the jolliest time as an excuse to host a co-ed holiday party. Invites went out quick and spread to everyone in their class. Careful planning and a few weeks later, the night had arrived. Food and drinks were plentiful, games at the ready and Christmas decorations hung with care, particularly one placed strategically at the end of the hall that led to the bathroom and close to the kitchen. It didn’t take long for everyone in attendance to be painfully aware of the sprig of bright green mistletoe, reflections of colorful string lights taped around the room shining in the waxy skin of scarlet red berries. Despite the festivities, the feasting and the fun, the little touch of nature suspended from the ceiling stayed in the consciousness of every teen. Girls giggled watching out for who would venture too close. The guys eyed it cautiously, stressing themselves over trips to the bathroom and who might be lurking nearby.

 

Eventually the symbolic little bunch of leaves claimed their first holiday victims. In some form of irony, potentially the poetic type, the very person who set the trap sprung it first. Bebe was caught under it with none other than Clyde, who smirked and waggled his eyebrows at her as he pointed upwards. For a moment she seemed surprised, as if she had forgotten all about it. But the reminder proved to be shockingly in Clyde’s favor. Rather than earning him a decent slap like Cartman and Kenny had bet, the class’s notorious blonde sighed, smiled softly, and pulled a dumbfounded Donovan into a solid kiss on the lips. There was a burst of gasps, squeals and hollers from the rest of them. When the smoke cleared, Bebe headed on her original path to the kitchen, smug and proud of herself while Clyde nearly stumbled back to the guys, eyes distance and mouth agape in a dreamy expression.

 

Once the initial shared kiss under the mistletoe was executed, it seemed that the corner it resided in saw more traffic. Which of course meant that there were plenty of encounters for spying on and cooing over. Wendy was caught with Kevin Stoley who seemed to turn to Stan to make sure it was alright to kiss his ex. A confident nod from Marsh gave him the push to seal the deal. Scott Malkinson had his time to shine under the mistletoe with Annie, who was more than happy to share her spotlight under the sprig. Craig and Tweek, one of the few established couples present, of course ended up as participants in the superstition, but amazingly not with each other.

 

Finally brave enough to venture towards the bathroom, Tweek kept a watchful eye on the mistletoe as if it could come to life any second and attack his face with its pointy little leaves that could at least scratch him up good if it tried. He wondered for a moment if what was hanging was actually mistletoe or if it was just a touch of holly, but his doubt was interrupted when he ended up face to face with Kyle. Directly. Under it.

 

“GAH! Oh shit, Kyle, I’m sorry! I wasn’t paying attention and…um…” The blonde’s cheeks set ablaze as he watched his classmate look up and see their fate. Fingers pushed against one another, a tick he had developed in order to deal with nervous energy rather than downing gratuitous amounts of coffee. Potential of a social faux pas kept his vision locked up until he heard the redhead’s soothing voice.

 

“Oh, hey it’s okay. I mean…listen we don’t have to if you or Craig aren’t comfortable with it. I’m sure you get a pass being in a relationship and all.” When he opened his eyes, Kyle was smiling. He had grown a charming, disarming smile over the years and though he was faithful to Craig and thought of nearly no one else since they were kids, Tweek felt his heart skip a beat.

Gazes were upon them, he could just sense the intensity. Panic started to set in, but the blonde pummeled it into submission as he organized his thoughts. Yes he was worried about sharing a kiss under the mistletoe with someone else other than his boyfriend but at the same time, what would happen if he refused? Likely ridicule of varying degrees from the rest of the partygoers. Could he risk that? Stressful…

 

Warm hands found Tweek’s shoulders and steadied him. They were Kyle’s. “Hey Craig! If Tweek is okay with it, you mind?” he asked, an upwards nod flicking towards the bundle of leaves that may or may not be mistletoe. The couple exchanged glances, communicating wordlessly with their eyes, brows and expressions.

 

At the end of the silent exchange, Craig smirked. “Trust me, Tweek is fine with you.”

 

“Craig!”

 

“And I am too. Go ahead, Kyle. Enjoy it while you can.” Permission granted, Tucker returned to his conversation with Token, Clyde and Kenny.

 

“Are you…really fine with it being me?” Kyle checked, the tone of his words the verbal representation of walking on eggshells.

 

Tweek sighed and scratched mindlessly at his arm. “Well…I mean….y-yeah. You’re really awesome and you’ve always been nice to me, Kyle.” The compliment pulled Kyle’s lips into a smile. “A-And you’re really cute.” That one tugged at his heart and summoned up a pint or two of blood to his face.

 

“Hahah, really? You think so?”

 

“For sure! Ahaha,” Tweek confirmed with a chuckle. The two adjusted themselves before they closed in and pressed their lips together in a sweet kiss that weakened the girls’ knees and made them swoon.

 

“Damn…that’s actually really hot,” Craig grinned.

 

The party continued on even after the Broflovski-Tweak exchange threatened to put half the female attendees out of commission. Food, festivities, and fun fueled them all. On the return from the kitchen, Stan felt a firm hand grip his Captain America Christmas sweater and pull him back. He collided with a grunt against the wall around the corner. There he was met with the heavy-lidded stare of Craig Tucker. “Where do you think you’re going?”

 

“Back to the group, what’s it look like? Jesus, Craig, that kinda hur-!” A knowing smirk and upward turned finger made the class athlete’s words catch in his throat. Slowly his bright blues followed the path Craig pointed out. Though he didn’t have to look. He just knew. They were perched under the mistletoe. “C’mon, Craig, dontcha think you get a pass? I mean, you’re with Tweek. He’ll probably be upset if you’re kissin’ other people,” Stan laughed, albeit weakly, as he straightened himself against the wall, fixing the knitted fabric of his sweater so the shield laid properly. He noticed Craig was leaning against the same wall as him, his hand placed parallel to his own head. Classic.

 

“Were you not paying attention before, Stan?” Craig’s deep voice was steady and hid a hint of mischief that worried the one against the wall. “I let Tweek kiss your bestie Kyle. I can guarantee that me and you…won’t be a problem.”

 

“ _ Shit _ ”. It took a conscious effort on Stan’s part to not choke on the lump forming in this throat. He hoped that Tweek would swoop in and save the day as Craig called his attention. That he would say he wasn’t comfortable with it and that Stan could slink away and leave Craig alone in the hall. Yet that’s not what happened. “Yeah, I mean, you let me kiss Kyle so…all’s fair if Stan is ok.”

 

Craig’s shit-eating grin was nearly too much to bear. “Well…now that that’s out of the way, how about we check and see if this kiss will be as hot as I think it’ll be?”

 

“Wh-Whoa, what?!” Stan’s voice disappeared, leaving his words cracked as if he were going through middle school puberty all over again. “What the hell, dude?”

 

“Oh c’mon Marsh. You don’t think that you and me making out won’t be hot as fuck?”

 

“No! I mean…no!”

 

“Ah, see you started to take it back. C’mon. Promise you’ll probably enjoy it,” Tucker added, his tongue skating across his lower lip in a hungry wolfish show.

 

“Fuck you, Craig,” Stan growled back, his face flushed.

 

“How about this? You don’t like it, you can punch me. Right in the face. That work for you?”

 

One dark brow vaulted over a wary blue eye. “You are  _ really _ determined about this, aren’t you?”

 

“Oh hell yes.”

 

After mulling over the options, Stan heaved a rough sigh. “Fine, let’s get this ov-!” That sentence would never finish. Soon as there was an affirmative, Craig’s mouth latched onto Stan’s. Enough force was packed behind his lips that Stan found himself pinned to the wall by the kiss. At first his body went into fight or flight, wanting to escape, but soon his muscles melted and the raging vocabulary in his brain muted. All that was left was Craig Tucker…and how good that asshole was at kissing.

 

When they pulled apart, there was an air of smug around Craig thick enough to set off an asthmatic, and that nearly earned him the punch he offered Stan. Yet he just couldn’t bring himself to do it for some reason. Maybe it was all the eyes on them. Instead Marsh averted his eyes and attempted to struggle into his cool guy persona. “Well, there ya go. Hope you’re happy with how hot that was.” He escaped the wall and headed back towards the bulk of the party, but paused a split second when Craig’s voice called out after him.

 

“So you thought it was hot too, huh? Heh, thought you would.”

 

That little episode of the happenings under the mistletoe left a few reeling for a while and many steered clear of the danger zone. That is until a chance meeting that put another unlikely pair in the crosshairs of the holidays.

 

“Oof! Oh God, I’m sorry!” Red apologized as she tried to recover from walking smack into another person. She had been on a return trip from the bathroom and must have zoned out too long on the way back to the festivities. “Are you okay, Kenny?”

 

The fluffy headed blond’s mouth was covered by a red and yellow plaid scarf that matched his Iron Man Christmas sweater; she couldn’t see the smile but could tell by the perk of his cheeks and glint in his eyes that it was under there somewhere. “Yeah I’m alright, are you okay? Didn’t hurt ya, did I?” he checked, friendly as always despite the slight muffle to the ask.

 

“Yeah, I’m fine! I can’t believe I spaced out like that though haha!” the bright redhead chuckled quietly as she brushed back a few scarlet strands of hair that clung to her cheek from the collision. 

 

“Hey, no worries!” Kenny assured her. That was when another voice entered the fray.

 

“Ohmygod RED! You’re under the mistletoe~ with Ke~nny!” Bebe’s melodic observation broke out from the living room, putting the game a few of them were playing on hold to watch another pair fall victim to the holiday tradition. 

 

As if they had practiced it before, Red and Kenny’s eyes met before both glanced up. Indeed their fated crash had left them loitering under the infamous bundle of leaves. At first, Red wasn’t sure what to say or do except stare at the boy across from her and see what he did. It wasn’t a secret that he was a perv, but it was also a known fact that he was a sweetheart too. That much was evident by how he made sure she had gone through bumping into him unscathed. So she wasn’t sure how he’d react to the whole mistletoe madness. 

 

“Well...to be honest, I could always go for a kiss from Red,” Ken admitted, scratching idley at the back of his head. Light yellow spikes of hair bounced from his touch. It was hard to tell if the crimson tint to his cheeks was blush or a weird reflection from his scarf, but one could get that it was the former. 

 

The response was surprisingly sweet sounding when coupled with the lighthearted yet unsure tone that came through the fabric covering his mouth. In fact it made Red’s heart skip a beat and her face flush. “I...well…” Suddenly realization hit her. “You know, I just realized that I’m not even 100% sure what you look like under that scarf? You always wear it and since we haven’t had gym together, I don’t recall the last time I actually saw it!”

 

“Oh, really?! Oh man that’s hilarious! Well, here.” Scratched up hands rose and tugged the accessory down, revealing Kenny’s face. “That better?”

 

“Uh...uh huh…”

 

“Red? You okay?”

 

Suddenly it dawned on Red the reason Kenny’s scarf stays put; to keep the rest of the girls and some of the boys from getting distracted at school. He was cute, hot and precious all rolled into one. How someone even did that was beyond her but regardless, it didn’t matter. All that did matter was that she was able to bask in the glory. 

 

“Earth to Red? Hello~,” Ken waved a hand in front of the other’s face. “You still in there?”

 

“Huh? Oh yeah! I’m here! Hi,” she grinned, eyes fluttering to a half closed state.

 

“Alright, cool. Thought I lost ya for a sec. Anyway, you ok with this whole mistletoe thing n-! Mmm!” Kenny received his answer in spades as Red practically lunged at him, arms wrapping tight around his neck and soft, eager lips on his. He growled in approval and pulled her in close by the waist, the corners of his mouth tilting up into a victorious grin. 

 

When the couple finally separated, there was a quiet exchange among them that resulted in some kind of agreement. Face pink and feet light, Red made her way to Bebe and the group whose game was paused in favor of her encounter. “Well?! What was that about?!” Wendy questioned when she settled in. 

Coyly Red peeked back at Kenny who had rejoined the guys; they seemed to be grilling him for the same information. One blue eye winked at her across the room and she giggled. “We’re uh....going on a date next week.”

 

You could practically hear Bebe’s heart stop. “WHAAAAAAAAAT?!”

 

Another helping of snacks and desserts were doled out along with some new bottles of soda cracked open. Some games were started while others barely finished before a true victor was crowned. Eventually a bladder fueled by multiple helpings of Sprite pleaded Kyle for relief. Quickly he excused himself from his current group and disappeared down the Christmas lit hallway. His absence did little to halt the topic of conversation floating among the guys which had centralized itself on Stan and his mistletoe run in with Craig earlier.

 

Had he enjoyed it? Would he do it again? Did he like dudes? Would he kiss another one of the guys if the scenario presented itself? A lot of different questions were flung at the high school athlete and much to his surprise and chagrin, he wasn’t quite able to answer any of them fully. These weren’t things he ever considered before. Rather, these were things he didn’t  _ want _ to consider before. Not that he had any issue with anyone in the LGBT community. He grew up in one of the most progressive houses in South Park thanks to his dad. However he still worried how people might perceive him different if he discovered that he liked men too. It was...an overwhelming thought to bear. Even if no one else felt differently about him and he had all the support of friends and family, Stan would feel something shift with how he dealt with himself. It would be a game changer as he explained it those curious who were he considered trustworthy, and he wasn’t sure how he felt about it.

 

“So jury’s out, huh? Meh, fair enough, dude. Just know that it ends up you like the D, I don’t give a shit, you do you,” Kenny grinned wide behind his scarf and clapped his troubled friend on the shoulder. “Even if what you’re doin’ is guys.”

 

“Shut up, Ken. But thanks. Means a lot, dude.” The longtime friends shared a carefully placed fist bump and moment of true friendship. Until the blond felt a disturbance in the force. Blue eyes scanned the room until they zeroed in on a potential issue. A huge, sheming, fatass one. 

 

“Oh fuck,” Kenny groaned under his breath.

 

“What’s up?” Stan queried with an eyebrow lifted.

 

The poorest of the bunch nodded his head in the direction of the kitchen, “See who’s coming down the lane?”

 

“Yeah, it’s Cartman. What’s your point?”

 

“See who’s coming down  _ that _ lane?” Ken continued, motioning a few feet down.

“Yeah, it’s….oh no.” Suddenly both Stan and Kenny’s minds were one and they were both picturing the same horrific outcome of events. Cartman continues lumbering along at this trajectory and as he comes up on the corner of the hallway and living room…

 

“RIP Kyle,” Kenny croaked quietly. 

 

Something in Stan flared up at that moment. An unstoppable urge to get up and protect his best friend. A need to shield him from a fate worse than death. And he had precious little time. His body jumped to action, weight lurching forward to get him in the right direction as fast as possible. Socked feet padded across the carpet, maneuvering between other party guests with the skill and grace one would expect from the South Park High School’s prized football player. Just as he reached the interception point, there was a collision. 

 

“Ah! Shit…Stan?” Kyle groaned as his hand went to mindlessly nurse a rib that had struck against his best friend. “What are you doing? You need to go that bad or something?”

 

“No! I just...Kyle…” Why was he out of breathe? He didn’t even go that far yet Stan was still struggling for air. His heart was racing. Face flushed. Suddenly the social consequences of his actions struck him like a truck. Panicked eyes glanced up and spotted the hell sprig before peeking over his shoulder and seeing Cartman’s own brown eyes narrowed atop chubby cheeks at him, no doubt wondering what the hell he was doing. Honestly, Stan didn’t know either. But he knew what he had to do to protect the person who mattered most of all to him in the entire party. “Listen, I’ll explain later! Just know I had to do something!” he barked quietly before grabbing each of Kyle’s shoulder and pulling him into a kiss.

 

Leaf green irises nearly exploded out of Kyle’s head as he felt Stan’s lips on his. The impact was solid, sure and nearly unforgiving. Whatever Marsh had rambled beforehand slowly melted away in his consciousness and nothing was left but the kiss. His lips were pleasant, much softer than one might believe. It was a chaste kiss yet something about it still felt really passionate, like it stood for something that Stan wholeheartedly believed in. Kyle’s heartbeat pounded against his rib cage as he succumbed to what felt like a kiss that lasted longer than either could have anticipated. Honestly it likely only broke because Cartman is an asshole.

 

“‘Ay! I knew you two were fuckin’ gay!” They separated with a light smack as Stan pulled back. “Aww, what’s the matter? Not gonna slip your boyfriend the tongue, Stan? You don’t wanna disappoint Kahl, do you?” His nasally voice was sing-songy, registering at a tone that irked them both to no end. A reaction that only Eric Cartman could be the catalyst for. 

 

“Shut the fuck up, Cartman! I-I’m sure the only reason that happened, was the mistletoe, right? Stan?” It hurt him to say but it was the most likely excuse. Made sense...right?

 

South Park and it’s residents are known for being surprising. Stan Marsh was no exception. Kyle expected him to agree with the fairly innocent sentiment, but what he got was an arm around the shoulders. “That’s not...entirely it. We’ll talk about it later, okay?” his best friend whispered in his ear before shooting a cool glance at Cartman. “But part of it was definitely making sure that fatass didn’t get to kiss you before I did.” 

 

Kyle blinked a few times, his brain working overtime to register what happened as Stan walked him away from the stunned loudmouth. A few steps in and he grinned bashfully at the smirking brunette escorting him. 

 

“AY! FUCK YOU, I DIDN’T WANNA KISS KAHL! WHO THE FUCK WOULD WANNA KISS THAT JEW? YOU JUST…KEEP WALKIN’! YEAH! NO WAY DO I WANNA KISS FROM KAHL! No...no way….FUCK YOU, STAN, I HATE CHYU! YOU TOO, CRAIG! SHUT THE FUCK UP AND QUIT LAUGHING AT ME!”

  
  
  
  



End file.
